"When you get into a tight place and everything goes against
you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute
longer, never give up then, for it is just the place and time
that the tide will turn." -- Harriet Beecher Stowe
Most of my clients hire me because they want to answer the
question "What's next?" They feel dissatisfied with their
current job or life situation, but aren't sure what would
satisfy them.
They make lots of wonderful and necessary internal changes —
reshape their belief systems, overcome obstacles, gain clarity
and craft a vision for the future. Then they hit "The
Threshold" — that formidable mental canyon that appears once
you've identified what you want and blocks you from taking those
first steps toward making your dreams real.
Once you know what you want, you must cross The Threshold by
taking action. For many people, this is an onerous stumbling
block. A new host of fears rush in, making getting started about
as easy as taking the first step onto a rickety swing bridge
high above your mental canyon. It's common to experience:
- A fear of failure combined with such thoughts as "What if I
try out this vision and it doesn't work?"
- A fear of success combined with such thoughts as "What if I
bring this idea to fruition and my whole life changes?"
- An amorphous, yet fierce resistance to the task at hand.
The kind of resistance that ignites more creative
procrastination. (Having exhausted more common forms of
procrastination, I've been known to trim my toenails and
clean my computer keyboard in an attempt to avoid a task.
In fact, I think I see a few specks on my keyboard right
now...)
Here's a hint: Dreams and ideas come to fruition through
pragmatic action. It's true. You can envision, manifest, pray
and meditate on the state of your cuticles until the cows come
home. In fact, feel free to do this, but don't expect your
dream to come true.
The Mechanics of Moving Forward
How do you take action in the face of fear and resistance? Here
are some concrete steps to take you through the mechanics of
moving forward.
A — Acknowledge fear and take action anyway. Action is one of
the best antidotes for fear and anxiety. Many people decide
that feeling fear indicates an incorrect course of action.
Nope — not true. (Note: At the threshold, it's not uncommon
for you to feel attached to a specific outcome. Take action
and stay unattached to the outcome. We can't predict the
results of our actions; results may be immediate or may not
trickle down to you until two months or two years later.)
C — Create a community of support. Support is critical. If I
counted every time I've told a client "nobody who's successful
and accomplished has done it alone," I'd be a very rich woman.
If you don't have a supportive community, build one. Find
online communities in your field or areas of interest, visit
or join professional organizations, and take a look at your
friends and family. Who could you reach out to and ask for
support? I recall a time when I needed extra support as I
crossed that precarious mental swing bridge between one career
and the next. So I asked for it. I identified two people who
had room in their lives to give me extra support and I called
them and asked for it. They were my lifeline during the few
months I needed an extra boost.
T — Take charge. Be a leader in your own life. Set goals.
Make decisions. Get clear about what you're trying to
accomplish. Can't stand bookkeeping? Hire someone else to do
it. Plan. Organize your time. You are the only person who can
get yourself where you want to go.
I — Interview and research. If you're at the threshold,
chances are you have a thirst for more information whether
it's about your career transition into marine biology or your move to Tijuana. Schedule informational interviews. Set aside
time to research online and at the library. Read books and
magazines in your area of interest. Gathering concrete
information is the name of the game.
O — Over-reward yourself This is hard work! You must reward
and motivate yourself. The next time you identify a reward for
yourself, I challenge you to double it. If you haven't
rewarded yourself yet, you MUST do so immediately, if not
sooner. Here's why: living with mentality of abundance is
going to take you much farther than a mentality of scarcity
ever will.
N — Network, network, network Each time you speak to someone
about your dream or idea, make sure to utter the magic words,
"Who else should I speak to?" or wording to that effect. To
network is the act of building your physical connection to
people. When you feel uncomfortable asking others for help,
ask them how you can be helpful to them. In fact, no matter
what, ask that anyway.
Standing at the edge of going after what you want can be the
most challenging phase of transition. You're walking an
unsteady swing bridge between where you are and where you want
to be. The next time you find yourself on The Threshold
between your idea and bringing it to fruition, take a deep
breath and focus on this question, "What's my purpose right
now?" The answer will take you where you need to go.
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Claudette Rowley, Coach and Author
Helps entrepreneurs harness their potential & soar to new heights
Co-author ~
A Guide To Getting It: A Clear, Compelling Vision
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